by: Lauren Leduc Lemieux
I made the conscious decision last year to eliminate I can’t from my vocabulary. My mission was to make sure that if I was choosing to do something, or not do something, be it for me or someone else, that I was doing it for a really good reason. I wanted to be sure my actions and decisions were a clear reflection of what was important to me.
One day soon after, I can’t came out of my mouth – at a coaching conference, no less. Someone was placing chocolates on the tables and I commented how tempting they were. She said, ‘Well, help yourself.’ And I replied, ‘Oh no, I can’t’. EEEEEK! As soon as I said it, I felt myself cringe. I knew what was coming next. She quickly and happily replied, ‘Well you could … or you could choose not to – it’s your choice.’
EXACTLY!!
The I can’t came out so fast, so sheepishly, and without any strength behind it. It was passive and weak and an automated response. I completely disregarded myself, and the opportunity in front of me to make a conscious choice for myself not to eat that damn chocolate. Where is the power in I can’t – that’s right, there is none!
When you tell yourself you cannot have a sweet treat or glass of wine, that isn’t usually the case. You could, if you chose to, but in that moment, you are making a choice for yourself – a strong, decisive, empowered choice. By merely saying, Oh, I can’t have that …. you are doing yourself a huge injustice. You work your ass off, so when you are making healthy choices to honor your body, mind and spirit, celebrate! It’s not, ‘I can’t have that brownie’, it’s: I’m choosing not to because I don’t want the sugar; I’m choosing not to because I’m on a roll and want to keep going; I’m choosing not to because I’m looking damn good and that feels better than the brownie tastes!
Do you feel the difference?
I have a challenge for you – and it does not include any lunges, burpees, or push ups. The next time you have the opportunity to indulge, think twice before uttering the words: I can’t. Take a few more seconds to get clear on what you are actually choosing for yourself – and honor yourself by acknowledging and celebrating your choice. You’ve earned it.
Lauren Leduc Lemieux is a Whole Life Coach based out of Acushnet, MA. In January, 2013, Lauren left her family’s business after 18 years and set out on a journey to find her life purpose. Lauren earned her coaching certification on July 1, 2014 and is now a member of the International Coaching Federation. Lauren works with clients who are ready to move forward by learning how to make choices and decisions that reflect their values for personal growth & happiness and professional success & fulfillment.
“Facilitating transitions, one decision at at time.’
Lauren Leduc Lemieux, ACC, CPCC
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